‘Tis the season to ask all the wrong questions

The thing about writing a blog is that there’s a written account of things I meant to do….or things I wish I had never done….but most often of things that make me look a fool. It’s not a talent, mind you, I am just naturally foolish. Foolish and not very shy. Case in point, my ambitious rule of the PTA bulletin board at Gavin’s school.

Trust me, it was hard finding appropriate pictures for this post

Let’s face it. Everyone’s going to experience varying degrees of embarrassment in their lifetime. No amount of careful planning or extreme level of avoidance is going to get you through life unscathed by failure, feelings of shame, or unusual amounts of humiliation. If your parents didn’t teach you this at a very early age, then you will have farther to fall, but take comfort in the fact that most of your friends will probably have a good laugh at your expense. It’s your basic win-win situation, with the exception being that it’s much harder to find the “win” as you’re falling than it is for your friends to fist-pump while shaming you with a Sharpie.

Titan of Sucking and Blowing

A lot of people promote their assiness in this world. Few do it as well as the Dyson guy. James Dyson. James Assface Dyson. Every time he opens his mouth on his pretentious vacuum commercials it’s always four wheels can only go in a straight line this and a ball can turn on a dime that and I’m left feeling completely shamed and inadequate about my vacuum cleaner choices.