UR PL8 SUX

I fucking hate vanity license plates. My hate is so extreme that I’m dropping the EFF word two words into this post. I’m confident they exist for the sole purpose of making me feel like a confused asshole, demeaning my intellect with their groupings of too many consonants and random numbers, bunched together in ways my eyes and brain can’t comprehend. I’m acutely aware of the fact that I read way too much into EVERYTHING ABOUT LIFE, I don’t need to add something as trivial as license plates to that growing list.

Got my rocks, got my wine from a box

I think it’s safe to assume that most adults are familiar with George Carlin’s rant that goes, “Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?” But did you know that my neighbors and I practice this approach on the daily?