Picasa, Head on a Stick, and that creepy Tickle Me Elmo

When I stumbled on Picasa by Google a few weeks ago, I thought I was one step ahead of the game in terms of photo collages. Turns out, this program has been out since 2006. I’m soooo up to date on technology. But in 2006 I was doing important things, like finishing my bachelor’s degree and only attending graduation via my besties’ hilarious creativity:

The safe word is “post-coital”

Today I have the supremely enjoyable task of picking up Tom’s semen analysis from the doctor. I figure it’s going to be way easier than when I had to take the actual sperm into the lab for the test, though. I remember it was during the winter and the lab told me to get it there within 30 minutes and to keep the sample at body temperature. What the fuck? All I was thinking was wouldn’t it be easier at that point if they just took it out of me? I mean, you don’t exactly want to be RUSHING while driving with a cup full of sperm under your ARMPIT. It was pretty much the most awkward sperm-related experience I had ever had, and I’ll be honest with you, I’ve had that stuff in my HAIR.